I attended a seminar this morning about teaching in a local school district. I’m definitely investing my $40 to apply. If I get accepted and I get hired, I’ll be teaching either middle school or high school English. Wouldn’t that be grand? Now, I just have to fill out the application and answer billions of questions about how I would teach. It’s actually pretty exciting. I think back to all those English teachers I had in high school, well, except for my senior year teacher, Mrs. Something or other, and they were the coolest. They would float in the classroom and allow our minds to float and dream up of all these possibilities.

Anyway, when I got home, I felt a little sad that I would be all alone tonight. My roommate is spending the night with my sister and I don’t want to stay over there because it’s weird. I feel like the odd man out when I’m with them, so after lunch, I skedaddled a.s.a.p. On my way home, I stopped by to get Javi (my new fish) some rocks for his bowl and pills to stabilize tap water for his bowl. Since I was right by Cactus Video and Music, I went to see if they had the Freddy Fender CD I was looking for and a copy of Garden State. I only scored Garden State (by the way, good movie). Okay, I’m way off the point. I was sitting around debating whether to watch the movie or a DVD for my class as I sat around and checked out my favorite blogs/journals/diaries and listened to some music. JV’s Oleada started to play on my MP3 player and even though I’ve sung along to it numerous times, for some reason, today, between the sadness, confusion and indecisiveness, it all made sense: I just gotta float along. I’ve been so determined to make my life take some kind of course, like I have to do certain things, and you know what? I don’t. I’ve always come to this conclusion in the past. I mean, of course, I’m not going to become a bum and live out of my car, but I just gotta go with the flow, as trite as that phrase is.

Somehow, this realization has made me…happy. It sort of reminded me of my trip to Mexico this past summer. It was all a blank Word document, ready for me to fill up with my jargon and in the end, I have this beautiful picture next to my desk of Zacateros street in San Miguel de Allende, which I gaze at almost ever day for that high that words just can’t explain.

1 comment:

cindylu said...

I love that song. I listened to it a lot when I was trying to decide where I was going to go grad school. I thought it meant that I had to leave LA, but in the end the wave brought me back here... er, kept me here.