24.6.05

Blogger Dreams

I've been in pretty gloomy mood lately, but it seems that things are starting to get better. Last night, when I got home from my writer's group meeting, there was mail on the table. I noticed a post office slip for Daniel, some magazines, one from AAA and Legion and finally, there was a letter from Pasadena Independent School District addressed to me.

I had applied for their alternative teacher's certification program back in April but had not heard a word from them. This led me to the depressive mood, because I honestly did have my heart set on teaching for them. It's in an area that is very diverse and yet, I feel that I would be able to relate to the students. Plus, it doesn't give me the overwhelming feeling of doom that HISD gives me. Anyway, the letter asked me to take in a copy of my transcript, which states that I did in fact receive a B.A. degree. I'm crossing my fingers and hoping that if I can't get a job teaching high school English I can at least do middle school.

On Wednesday night I had this really funky dream. Dan the Man, Gabi, Bo and I were at the crappy amusement park in El Paso. We were on some ride that swung back and forth like a pendulum. I remember that we were considering which section to get on so that we'd get the biggest thrill. I remember being on the ride and doing the pansy thing I always do, closing my eyes when we were to far off the ground and coming down. (I'm afraid of height, but I always make myself do these things for the thrills)

Anyway, as I was getting off the ride, my roommate drove up and rolled down the window. I was holding Dan the Man's hat and went over to see what she wanted.

“Someone's looking for you,” she said.

“For me?”

“Yeah, some girl named Gabriela. She said she needs to talk to you. I just saw her over on the other side, get on, I'll give you a ride so you don't miss her.”

I got on the car and she dropped me off on the other side of the amusement park. I remember leaving Dan the Man's baseball cap in her car and thinking he was going to be mad at me. Somehow, I knew what this Gabriela looked like because I spotted her right away. Actually, she kinda looked like Bella Chicana. Anyway, I went up to her and asked her if she was looking for me and she said, “Yeah.”

“Well, here I am.”

“I wanted to talk to you about your blog.”

“Okay.”

“I don't like what you write. I don't think you should be talking…”

It all became a blur after thing, but I remember her telling me that she didn't like what I said about the Catholic Church or how I treated Dan the Man. I remember that I told her to mind her own damn business because this was MY blog and I could do as I damn well pleased with it.

It was all so weird because it felt so real. Its funny how our minds take all our concerns and make one big jumbled mess out of them when we fall asleep.

4 comments:

mariposatomica said...

Do you dream in color? Just curious. Si estoy de metiche;) Hey, Cracked Chancla interrprets dreams! Two weeks back I told her my dream and about a week later what she had told me came true. Very weird. I'm waiting to have another dream to test it out again.

cindylu said...

I don't think I've ever had a dream related to blogging. That would just be too weird. Escribe lo que quieres.

La Brown Girl said...

Mariposa:I actually do dream in color most of the time. I dream almost everyday, but I always forget about this time of day. Anyway, in that dream, the colors I remember are "Gabriela's" dark hair, white shirt, and my roomate's car.

Cindylu: It was really weird. I guess I've been thinking a lot about what I should and shouldn't write in here. Now that some people know who I am, things have changed.

Cracked Chancla said...

well, mariposa is adding the pressure. i'm not psychic, i just read a book on dreams and i'm using what i learned.

its sounds like a release dream. meaning that some of the anxities or fears you feel and/or supress during your waking hours are released through your dreams.

You told cindylu that:
"I guess I've been thinking a lot about what I should and shouldn't write in here. Now that some people know who I am, things have changed."

I think you hit the nail on the head. Also, the mean things this girl told you might be actual stuff that has passed through your thoughts.

....err, i'm no expert, okay.